about us

programs

publications

reading room

press

support us

contact us

home

Female Couples Taking the Lead in Same-Sex Marriage 
Sacramento Bee
By Dorothy Korber and Bobby Caina Calvan
June 20, 2008

So far, lesbians account for 60% of same-sex licenses in county

The conventional view that women embrace commitment more eagerly than men is playing out in the unconventional new world of same-sex matrimony, judging from the growing stack of marriage licenses in Sacramento County.

Based on a tally of the licenses Thursday – using first names as a guide – 60 percent of the same-sex newlyweds this week are lesbians and 40 percent are gay men. Among heterosexual couples – to no one's surprise – the gender breakdown is 50-50.

For academics who study gay and lesbian lifestyles, the preponderance of women marching up the aisle is also no surprise.

In states that offer some kind of legal recognition to same-sex couples, lesbians in committed relationships outnumber gay men by a 2-1 margin, said Gary Gates, a demographer at the Williams Institute at UCLA's School of Law.

Studies suggest that women pair up more often because they are more likely to have children together. Men, who historically out-earn women, are less likely to partner for economic protection.

"Women want to be married more than men do," said Gates. "The idea of partnering is more attractive to women."

Yet some studies suggest that gay men are in relationships of longer duration than lesbians, Gates said, noting that women initiate divorce at a higher rate than men.

One clear pattern is that lesbian couples are more likely than gay men to raise children – four times as likely, according to a national survey conducted in 2005 by UC Davis psychologist Gregory Herek.

"I think that for many couples, one of the important factors in formalizing their relationship is the presence of children, for the protection that marriage provides," Herek said.

In Yolo County, lesbian newlyweds outnumbered men by an even greater percentage than in Sacramento. Since Monday, the Yolo County clerk has issued 26 same-sex marriage licenses, 17 of them – or 65 percent – to lesbian couples.

Longtime Davis resident Ellen Pontac, who married her partner Monday evening, has a theory to explain Yolo's popularity among female couples.

"When we moved to Davis, we still had three kids at home, and it just was a great place to be a kid – it's a wonderful family town," Pontac said.

In Sacramento County, about 170 couples took out marriage licenses on Tuesday and Wednesday. Of those, at least 133 were gay or lesbian couples – based on analysis of their first names. At least 26 were presumed to be heterosexual couples.

For about a dozen of the licenses – with all due respect to Dusty and Robye – it was anybody's guess which gender the couples were.

This guessing game is the result of the state Supreme Court's May 15 decision that made same-sex marriage legal, effective Monday. Under the ruling, the California Department of Health, whose vital records office maintains marriage forms, did away with all terms identifying gender.

Instead of "bride" and "groom," those tying the knot are now simply referred to as "Party A" and "Party B."

"The data geek in me is absolutely frustrated that we can't actually determine how many same-sex couples get married," said UCLA's Gates. "Yet the other side of me totally gets it, that marriage is just marriage."

"No big deal," said Ward Connerly, the former University of California regent who has no use for boxes that categorize people.

Connerly led a failed 2003 crusade for a "racial privacy" initiative to strip racial identifiers from all government forms.

He has the same objection to the notion of collecting data on gender. "I don't know why the government needs to gather that information," Connerly said.

He plans to vote against the November ballot measure that would amend the state constitution to ban same-sex marriage.

"I don't think the government needs to know," he said. "I don't know why the public needs to know. It's not their life, it's not their business."